PC: Pre-Service Training Week Seven (part 2)
We started our Thursday of trainee-led sessions with our presentation on co-facilitation. We ended up talking about co-facilitation through facilitating a session on gender-based violence. Everyone participated well and the questions generally provoked thoughtful responses. At the end we asked the group to identify what we did as co-facilitators and what they would like to change. A couple of the good things were that we had a variety of activities (individual, large group and small group) that got everyone involved, we connected the dots as people gave ideas, we guided the discussion and let the group self-direct. I want to remember from the session to make sure to include everyone in circle discussions, so if someone comes in late make sure to greet them and invite them into the circle, and don’t assume that just because there are enough chairs that people will take them rather than sit off to the sides. Ask them to join the group. Also, someone suggested that we should have asked them put themselves in the mindset of a Salvadoran, rather than coming from the “strong American woman” background. Their reaction and perception of power may have been very different in the case studies if we had done that.
Putting ourselves in the Salvadoran mindset may be the hardest thing about doing Peace Corps. Jenny actually brought the same topic up later, when we were talking about being Change Agents, and again in our debrief of the Trainee Facilitation Sessions (TFS). She said the most common thing RPCVs regretted about their service was acting in a situation without thinking about the cultural context and consequence. The “American way” is usually not the way that will work here, and cultural insensitivity can lead to all kinds of problems in our professional relationships and in our projects. We have to remember that sustainability means working within the cultural context, not trying to change the entire culture of our community in two years.
I really liked the dinámica that started off the TFS on the volunteer as a Change Agent. It started with instructions to follow the rules absolutely. We had to stand opposite each other, turn our backs, then change three things. Each partnership had to identify the changes, then we repeated the activity changing five things. Then we returned to our seats. What we didn’t realize is that at the end we went back to our “normal selves.” We put everything about ourselves back to the way it was before we had started the activity, something that was not in the instructions. For that session it highlighted our resistance to change and transitioned perfectly into the discussion on changing our behavior or that of others, which techniques work and which don’t. Guilt, for example, is rarely a good strategy for changing another’s behavior. We talked a lot about letting people learn for themselves, and how painful it is to watch a train wreck you know is going to happen and you can’t stop.
In thinking about changing behavior and beliefs, I could immediately identify a lightbulb moment in my life. I used to judge immediately based on intelligence, and take that as the sole value of a person. I had a friend who when we first became friends, the first thing I thought was that it wouldn’t last because he wasn’t as smart as me. At some point I must have mentioned intelligence when talking about other people one too many times, and he finally asked me why I cared some much how smart people are. It stopped me in my tracks. I never even realized that my value judgements were purely based on intelligence. He talked about the stories that people have, about kindness and goodness and perception and listening. He opened my eyes to my own perceptions and biases because he saw the world in a way I never even considered. He could sit for hours talking to truck drivers, while I judged them for doing nothing better with their lives than driving trucks. With him I learned to listen, to see the beauty in people (though I will never trust in the innate goodness of people as he does), and to stop judging. There was so much I wasn’t learning because I wasn’t listening. I have never learned more from anyone as I have from that friend over the years, and we have stayed friends despite distance and life changes because we understand each other completely. My behavior and beliefs changed for the better because of our friendship - every person has something to offer and patience and understanding will reveal it. I became more tranquila (chill is the best translation, though it doesn’t quite capture the meaning of the word) and happier, more open and flexible. Thank goodness we met before I went backpacking and before Peace Corps, because I would not be the same person without his influence.
I completely understood when Jenny said that we seem to think of ourselves as the “volunteer,” but don’t realize that we are actually all of the things we talk about as well. We need to realize that we are there as co-planners, co-facilitators, change agents, learners, mentors, co-trainers, and consultants. It’s not that we wear many hats, but that we need to know how to react in situations, how to pull the best out of a group, and where and how we can be effective. When we got the topics for the TFS sessions no one was particularly thrilled, but on the whole they have been helpful not only to give us practice giving sessions, but also to realize the roles we will play in the community and situations we may encounter.
Friday morning we met with one of the directors of development (or something like that) of an NGO that works in the area. After all of our work on planning sessions, he gave the perfect example of how not to make a powerpoint. Every slide was absolutely packed with words, he didn't give examples, and he skipped about half of the slides. It actually sounds like a good NGO that has done a lot to help protect children in El Salvador. I also thought it interesting that the NGOs here made a pact between themselves that if one is working in one region, then no other NGO that does the same thing can work in that region. This means that PLAN International and World Vision have divided their work in El Salvador into regions. If we ever want to do work with children's rights or protection of children, since we will be living in the Eastern part of the country, we will have to work with World Vision (not that I mind either way, but World Vision has significantly more funding and programs in El Salvador).
After the rep left, each Spanish group gave a presentation on a typical Salvadoran celebration so that we understand how to act if we are ever invited to any. We talked about weddings, funerals, birthdays, quinceañeras, baptisms and graduations. The biggest thing to remember is to never accept if someone asks me to be a madrina (godmother) for any of the festivals. The padrinos (godparents) are just people who are financially responsible for some aspect of the festival like buying the cake or the dress. I am not about to spend my measly Peace Corps salary on some fifteen-year-old's party dress. Oh sure, I will be terribly diplomatic about the whole thing if I'm asked and stress how honored I am that they would think of me, but the end result will always be refusal.
Our afternoon continued as afternoons do, with our women's group. Lots of other trainees showed up, but very few of the women's group were there because they were attending a meeting about the independence day celebrations. With the few who were there we worked on crocheting little bags and making bracelets. Emily and Mario look like they want to die every time we do any sort of hands-on activities that don't serve a purpose further than just making something, but those are my favorite days. I love basically any sort of artisan work, and I certainly enjoy working with people more than standing in front of them. The leadership talk was fine, but that was Emily's element more than mine. Working on bracelets put me in the mood to work with my hands, and made things all weekend, especially since most bracelets can be made while reading and I needed to catch up on our book group.
Saturday was the start of the Central American Independence Day celebrations. The little kids from the local schools marched in the parade and the school bands marched and played a few tunes and it was cute. I spent most of the day reading I, Robot and working on bracelets, but I took a break in the afternoon to visit the artisan workshop and pick out a few yards of green natural hand-dyed cloth. The cloth was dyed using something from almond trees and a tie-dye design. Maybe I will figure out the postal system here and send it home, but I wouldn't count on it.
Putting ourselves in the Salvadoran mindset may be the hardest thing about doing Peace Corps. Jenny actually brought the same topic up later, when we were talking about being Change Agents, and again in our debrief of the Trainee Facilitation Sessions (TFS). She said the most common thing RPCVs regretted about their service was acting in a situation without thinking about the cultural context and consequence. The “American way” is usually not the way that will work here, and cultural insensitivity can lead to all kinds of problems in our professional relationships and in our projects. We have to remember that sustainability means working within the cultural context, not trying to change the entire culture of our community in two years.
I really liked the dinámica that started off the TFS on the volunteer as a Change Agent. It started with instructions to follow the rules absolutely. We had to stand opposite each other, turn our backs, then change three things. Each partnership had to identify the changes, then we repeated the activity changing five things. Then we returned to our seats. What we didn’t realize is that at the end we went back to our “normal selves.” We put everything about ourselves back to the way it was before we had started the activity, something that was not in the instructions. For that session it highlighted our resistance to change and transitioned perfectly into the discussion on changing our behavior or that of others, which techniques work and which don’t. Guilt, for example, is rarely a good strategy for changing another’s behavior. We talked a lot about letting people learn for themselves, and how painful it is to watch a train wreck you know is going to happen and you can’t stop.
In thinking about changing behavior and beliefs, I could immediately identify a lightbulb moment in my life. I used to judge immediately based on intelligence, and take that as the sole value of a person. I had a friend who when we first became friends, the first thing I thought was that it wouldn’t last because he wasn’t as smart as me. At some point I must have mentioned intelligence when talking about other people one too many times, and he finally asked me why I cared some much how smart people are. It stopped me in my tracks. I never even realized that my value judgements were purely based on intelligence. He talked about the stories that people have, about kindness and goodness and perception and listening. He opened my eyes to my own perceptions and biases because he saw the world in a way I never even considered. He could sit for hours talking to truck drivers, while I judged them for doing nothing better with their lives than driving trucks. With him I learned to listen, to see the beauty in people (though I will never trust in the innate goodness of people as he does), and to stop judging. There was so much I wasn’t learning because I wasn’t listening. I have never learned more from anyone as I have from that friend over the years, and we have stayed friends despite distance and life changes because we understand each other completely. My behavior and beliefs changed for the better because of our friendship - every person has something to offer and patience and understanding will reveal it. I became more tranquila (chill is the best translation, though it doesn’t quite capture the meaning of the word) and happier, more open and flexible. Thank goodness we met before I went backpacking and before Peace Corps, because I would not be the same person without his influence.
I completely understood when Jenny said that we seem to think of ourselves as the “volunteer,” but don’t realize that we are actually all of the things we talk about as well. We need to realize that we are there as co-planners, co-facilitators, change agents, learners, mentors, co-trainers, and consultants. It’s not that we wear many hats, but that we need to know how to react in situations, how to pull the best out of a group, and where and how we can be effective. When we got the topics for the TFS sessions no one was particularly thrilled, but on the whole they have been helpful not only to give us practice giving sessions, but also to realize the roles we will play in the community and situations we may encounter. Friday morning we met with one of the directors of development (or something like that) of an NGO that works in the area. After all of our work on planning sessions, he gave the perfect example of how not to make a powerpoint. Every slide was absolutely packed with words, he didn't give examples, and he skipped about half of the slides. It actually sounds like a good NGO that has done a lot to help protect children in El Salvador. I also thought it interesting that the NGOs here made a pact between themselves that if one is working in one region, then no other NGO that does the same thing can work in that region. This means that PLAN International and World Vision have divided their work in El Salvador into regions. If we ever want to do work with children's rights or protection of children, since we will be living in the Eastern part of the country, we will have to work with World Vision (not that I mind either way, but World Vision has significantly more funding and programs in El Salvador).
After the rep left, each Spanish group gave a presentation on a typical Salvadoran celebration so that we understand how to act if we are ever invited to any. We talked about weddings, funerals, birthdays, quinceañeras, baptisms and graduations. The biggest thing to remember is to never accept if someone asks me to be a madrina (godmother) for any of the festivals. The padrinos (godparents) are just people who are financially responsible for some aspect of the festival like buying the cake or the dress. I am not about to spend my measly Peace Corps salary on some fifteen-year-old's party dress. Oh sure, I will be terribly diplomatic about the whole thing if I'm asked and stress how honored I am that they would think of me, but the end result will always be refusal.
I don’t know why, but Friday night was one of the best. I taught Alex some bracelet-making techniques, we talked about our site interviews together, Anne brought a cool friend to pupusa night, Catherine and Emily were hilariously inappropriate coming up with scenarios for "would you rather," Noah and Hilary showed up in the park looking a million bucks after attending Shabbat in San Salvador (Hilary has this awesome white sparkly jacket that I love), Kai told the funniest story about a near-miss with our Country Director, we all hung out and danced and talked in the park until after 9 pm without even realizing the time, and on the ride home they all blasted music and sang along in the back of Roberto's pickup. We laugh a ton together and I'm so glad we are taking advantage of our last few weeks together.
In the evening we all headed out to the local shopping center to try to concentrate on writing our Readiness to Serve essays for a few hours. I took advantage of the supermarket to buy some more peanut butter, then hitched a ride back into town with one of the Nuevo Cuscatlán trucks. The second parade passed by the pupusería, so I went out to watch the drummers and the ceremonia de fuego (fire ceremony) then join everyone in the center of town for the end of the parade and dueling school bands. We couldn't help but laugh at the antics of one of the drunks at the end, who tried some break dancing that turned into general flailing. Back in the pupusería niña Ana, niña Blanca and I talked about cool places in El Salvador (I want to go back to Ataco and see paseo el Carmen for their artisan work) and niña Blanca gave me a big bag of pop tops so that I can make belts. Yay arts and crafts!
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